Seeing your little ones grow up gradually in front of your eyes is something that fascinates and amazes every parent. The way they outgrow their clothes, leave their old habits, embrace new toys, and start vocally expressing their needs are some of the noticeable changes in their growing years that every parent has been a witness too. Surely, it is fun to see the little person becoming an opinionated, verbal individual who has his own choices regarding the clothes he wants to wear, the food he wants for lunch, the way he wants to do his hair, and so on. However, when it comes to communicating more complex emotions and thoughts in words, this little person still has a long way to go.
We, at Lotus Valley International School, have seen through our years of guiding and mentoring children, that identifying the exact emotion that they are feeling and naming it does not really come easy to children. The cues of their actual feelings and thoughts are hidden behind the way they act in different situations. Being adults, it is our responsibility to not just decipher those feelings, but also help the children to channelize and control it in the right manner. Here’s how we believe you can master that art:
Delve deep into the root of the issue
Instead of judging the child based on his/her outward behavior, it is important that we delve deeper into the root cause of the issue. For instance, if you see your little one pulling his/her shirt over his head every time guests arrive, it simply means that he/she is feeling really anxious in front of new people. There is no point scolding the kid or taking away his/her new toy to stop the child from doing this. Instead, the focus needs to be on reducing the kid’sanxiety and shyness.
Self-regulate your own behavior towards children
When a child starts acting out in a certain way, the usual response of most parents is to give a firm consequence, like a time-out or taking away that video game. However, this will just end up making the child more and more distant and farther away from realizing his/her own emotions. We would suggest that instead of yelling at or scolding the kid, take a deep breath and try to ceasefire the situation by making the child calm down.
Engage in heart-to-heart discussions with your child
Deciphering the emotions behind their actions becomes a lot easier than ever when they know that they have a confident and a kind listener in you. When kids feel secure and safe in their relationships with you, they will open up more to you, and as you engage in heart-to-heart discussions with your child, you will see that understanding their inner thoughts and feelings is not too hard.
Talk about feelings and help them identify it
Read out books to them and make observations aloud about how the characters are feeling. For instance, the tortoise is happy and joyful to win the race, the dog is sad because his master left, and so on. When children are able to label their feeling, they are in a better position to gain control over their emotions as well as communicate those to others.
At Lotus Valley International School, ranked as the Best International School in Noida, we believe that the art of understanding children’s emotions, and in turn, helping them understand and deal with it, is a continuous process. It needs to start from the early years of childhood in order to ensure their growth into emotionally stable and mentally resolute individuals who have a firm grasp on their actions and feelings.